uneasy_cornerstone: (Default)
[personal profile] uneasy_cornerstone
Okay, so saga is probably too strong a word.

A few days ago, I opened my sliding glass door to get some air in my room since it's been pretty hot here. There was a giant bug, perched and lurking malevolently, between the netting part of the door and the glass. I screamed and slammed my door shut again, because it was a giant fucking bug and I didn't want it getting into my room and eating me in my sleep or whatever I thought it would do. Satisfied and thinking I had crushed it with my door, I slept well.

Fast forward to today. My mom is in the backyard and calls me out, so I open my sliding glass door and what do I see - yes, the giant fucking bug. I scream again, slam the door hoping for a more effective squashing, and go outside another way. My mom asks how I ever survive on my own, and eventually comes to kill the bug. We do not believe in the rights of bugs in this house. Just this morning we killed like fifty ants with Windex and vacuumed them up later.

Anyway, instead of disposing of the no doubt super dangerous bug, she knocks it into my room where it hides under her Pilates machine and then INSIDE MY SHOE. While I'm perched on the piano bench - again, this could be a dangerous giant fucking bug - the guy painting our house comes in and asks what all the fuss is. The bug is fucking skittering around in my shoe and I am still hiding in the hallway, so he kills it because apparently my mother and I are totally incompetent.

You can tell the painter isn't my dad because he didn't chase me around the house with the bug covered paper towel.

NOW I CAN SLEEP TRULY SAFELY. And also skip the gym tomorrow, since there are bug guts in my shoe.
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uneasy_cornerstone: (Default)

September 2010

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